suppose im sleeping right now. it is late midnight already.
tommorrow is monday.
however, couldnt know what is the reason, i hardly can fall asleep.
Perhaps i slept too much for this two days.
Or there is actually another reason for it??
my mind has a lot of things wondering in it.
what are them? i couldnt identify them well.
some of them bout my friends. some of them bout my study.some of them bout me and you. some of them bout theory of life. some of them bout my family. some of them bout conflicts. some of them even about my death.
haha.. funny isnt it?
i think im stress. am i ?
the question left unanswered.
but what am i stress for? TER?
am i really worrying bout my study??
..........................................
dotz=wordless.
admitedly part of it contributes to my depression.
however, i don thnk it is the major reason.
Then, what is it?!! com'on , let talk it out.
u are hanging the whole world half on the sky.
well, i really dono!! maybe this is wat called find trouble myself.
there is no problem for me, therefore im seeking for problem right now huh??
just in a sudden, i miss u much,
when i think of tomorrow is monday, i wish i could attend schoo like how i did at secondary school.
As i know the first one who catch my eye by standing at the coridor out of the class will be you. Of cos, i know tat u are waiting for my presence as well.
this is wat called love ya.
it is so damn funny and silly to think back old past time.
i could remmber i always tend to "merajuk" at that time, regardless how good u have treat me, i will still angry without reason, just to test how much u love me.
At this point of time, i heard the sound of fire cracker. any celebration out there? don care.. ignore it. let me continue to fall with my sweet memories.
i always reach school exactly the time for morning essembly. When every students is forced to line out the classroom, you always stand alone, by your own.
and then some of your gang friends will come and approach you, then i will be joining another group of friends, listening to their stories.
we are so near yet so far. we are so close to each other but we are staying at the different world, listening to different story. The irony of us..
the oni sweet time for us could be the time after school, when everyone is back, and we are the only two fellow stay back at school, not for studying purposes of cos, just simply wanna spend time together. How sweet are you by waiting me to finish my class as i have a longer period of class cos i took up extra subject.
I always wish the time could stop at that particular moment. Both of us find out that the time we spend together flee faster than usual. 1 hour, 2 hours, just gone by doin nothing. what left behind is only laughter, memories and footprint. Then it was time for you to back. You always back earlier than me, and i could still remember the sad feeling when i look at your back. when you turn over your body and just walk away from my eyesight.
well, i know im just too in love with you. and i m attach to you so much.
OMG, im missing you more and more.
then, i was thinking of my common tests again.
and my TER, the feelings unlike the time i took up my SPM.
Maybe i have more confident that time. or maybe i lost my confident right now is because im dealing with all scholars!! SCHOLARS man.. do u know how scary are them? can eat me up and swallow me. hahaa. furthermore, the system right now is all about comparison, how to compete with them? do i have that ability?
today i received an email from twah, it is actually a servay question, it asked me do i think i m smarter than the rest of my friendS? Yes-No? i chose No.. haha..
oh.. i should not lost my motivation, maybe i should just have faith in myself.
fight till the end and i will see the result!!! gogogo.. aka aka fighting!!
ya, i believe i can do it.
have been written so much, but i still havent got a sense of sleeping yet..
sigh.. what should i do..
am i having insomia right now?
is this a symptom of depression?
oh no.. im not going to scare myself to death..
just close my eye and i can sleep.. zzzzz
No comments:
Post a Comment