nonstop

Phew.. finished another hk drama again!
i think i really great.. can finish a drama in 3 days time. haha..
maybe im just too boring..
btw actually i have my legal assignment not done yet..
but then nvm la.. i just throw it aside..

last night i seemed to be a bit emotional..
i talked something that i don dare to you..
i dono what do you think in your heart when u received my sms,
cos u din give me even a word of reply..
but then nvm.. maybe it is better for it to left unknown..
because even until this moment,
i still don understand myself, what i want in this relationship..
the relationship seems to be cool off for quite a long time,
but then i stil don feel like let go.
am i too silly for this, maybe gua,
i have a feeling that we can go forever.
but sometimes the real world doesnt allow me to think that way.
i feel my warmth through another way rather than you again..
so what is this indicate??
you donwan to think, so i donwan to think also,
but will the problem solved by itself in this way ?
No.. right..
but what can i do..
im blocked outside of the door of your heart.
am i still the key holder to your heart, or you have taken it back and keep it to yourself..
it is always a raining day for these few days, well..
i miss you even more especially at night..
so what? nothing will change..
life stil goes on!
al still alive, and of cos i will be alive too.
sometimes i kinda pity with him..
he is just the victim of this polygamy game..
but then he fall too deep, until he cant pull himself out.
maybe we should ask him,
it is he cant let go,or he doesnt wan to let go..
isnt it sound the same like me? hahaa..
we are sharing the same characteristic..
everytime he wants to find me, he is scared.
scared of my no-reply..
scared of my coldness to him in my own sms..
and what i scare when i see you..
scared of i bother you too much.
scared that i put too much pressure on you..
all this because of fear..
and there is a feeling that he wont success in getting me to be his.
so is there still the same for me?
i will never be yours?
..............................
i dono why i type this post..
maybe it is hard to fully understand this post too..
it is just crapz..
again.. and again...
everything is turning in a cycle..
nonstop...
until the times reach its ends....