It has been long time ago...

I used to think it was distance that brought us to the end.
I used to afraid distance because
It was a bad guy.
It shut the door of the hearts.
It created barrier that I can't even jump through.
It made me blind.
It caused the distance between me and you.
Basically, I blame distance for everything.
Yet I failed to look at myself
It was me who shuts the door of my heart
It was me who chose not to jump
It was me who not to see properly
It was also me who refused to reach you.


You have been telling me,
you are tired for being the one who keep giving out,
without getting any return,
you cant see the future in us if I continue to behave this way,
you are not saying it for real,
you just want my attention more,
however, I took it seriously,
and I agreed there will be no future in us,
so I move on,
hoping that you will move on too...
Not long ago,
I found out that
you still stayed at the same place
Now, who is the one who break their promise?
Who is at fault?


Not distance,
it is not distance that pulls us apart.
it was me.
it was my immaturity.
when I have little knowledge about you and your current life,
I started to feel insecure
I started to feel worry
I started to feel afraid
afraid of your leaving
and before my fear comes true
I decided to end it by myself
there goes the end of the story

Is it really an end?
let not discover the answer
let's the question open ended
let's the time filled in the blank

I suppose the relationship of human never end easily
we have been so intimate
we have been so close
we have been everything to each other
the days, the moment, the seconds...
I never forget
It is just putting aside
it may seem to be we have paved our own ways
it does not means we can never cross our life together again
I still care for you
I hope you can be strong
for yourself

No matter how hard is the life
No matter how terrible you felt
It is your life
once you love it
nothing is terrible
it was about passion
remember?

It does not matter
even if I am not beside you
even if I am not the one closest to you
even if I am not talking to you
even if I am not hearing from you personally
even if you are no longer the same
It does not matter
the matter is you are having a good life
appreciate yourself
you will be successful
and I will be proud of you